It was Day 5 of Foster’s Winter Retreat in Costa Rica — January, 2024. In the morning writing circle, I wrote a letter to my mom, who was recently diagnosed with a degenerative disease. Metabolizing & adapting to these changes in my family system at age 31 has felt like a final initiation into womanhood. The question I asked before I wrote the letter was: “If my mother could speak her truth what would she say?” “If my mother wasn’t afraid who would she be?” Writing that letter purified my heart and made space for a larger message to come through later that morning from the “eternal mother.”
I read this piece in the open air, straw-roofed yoga shala to the 26 people who participated in the retreat. I invited the men to sit in a circle in the center of the shala, surrounded by all the women, in a circle, holding hands — the image that came to me as I wrote.
Writing this piece felt like a distinct experience of “transmission.” I’ve been learning more about & invoking the love between Mary Magdalene & Jesus, and I dedicate this piece to them. May the wisdom, power & healing of their relationship live on within, amongst & between us.
I’ve attached a recording too — the original way the piece was received.
With love,
Steph
Art by Sílvia Bastos
Call forth the men you want to see, the man you want to love. We can’t do what needs to be done without them. I know we are hurting. I know we’ve been wronged - raped, taken from, left limp weary and dry. It is time to forgive. They will continue to harm us unless we provide an alternative—an invitation to be of service to life. We contain that potential for life within us—the womb, the mystery, the void where it all began. We know the difference deep in our bones between life giving exchange and depletion. It is not too much to ask for this to happen in our lifetime. We don’t have enough linear time for it not to. The Great Mother needs us to wake up. She needs ALL OF US here, now, together. Not just the masculine leading the feminine, not just the feminine leading the masculine—she needs all of us dancing in coevolutionary harmony. As we step into this new age is it our turn to lead by example—to use our One Voice, United, that collectively births a new world: a new way of being, partnering, relating, creating. Call on your sisters to clear your womb space and trust your heart—to be rich fertile soils for the life that is begging to be born.
We need the men. We have to love the men. We don’t have time to indulge the boys, but we can love them nonetheless. With a clear invitation: we need you in your integrity, we need you in your love and in your servitude. We need you in your power so that you can meet us in ours. In all of its dynamic expressions—the mother, the maiden, the destroyer, the holy whore. Do not deceive yourselves and think that we can only be the one you want. If you try to contain us without our consent, you will know. This time we will show you with love a new choice.
My ask is that you honor the silence. The stillness. The sacred, dark, wet terrifying void that has always been here. It’s ok to be scared. If you listen you will begin to hear a new song—a powerful one—that invites you to join us in harmony. One voice, many tones. Listen to our truth so that you can feel yours. We love you, we need you, we want to worship you. You are invited to become the man who is worthy of it. We can show you how.
Wow. What a powerful piece. Thank you so much for writing and sharing this. I felt it deep in my bones. ❤️
Absolutely beautiful wisdom